A Bit of History and Some Solutions
In the spring of 2002, I was asked to start a chapter of PACE in Akron, and agreed. I have been an outspoken supporter of equal parenting since my divorce in 1995. I had, until recently, what so many are trying to achieve and what all should have automatically- equal custodial rights with my son.
Now, this has not been an easy thing to maintain, as I have had my rights challenged three times in court, having had to go through three full-blown custody battles just to maintain what was agreed to in the divorce settlement, and now my rights have been terminated completely as a parent, by a judge that admitted that I knew Ohio law better than he did. I have had false accusations made about me that have resulted in restraining orders which were ultimately thrown out because they were found to be untrue.
The courts here do not like me and have stated such on the record. I don't care what they think as I have only done what is right and proper under the law regarding my son. If you are an officer of the court who cannot respect the equal rights of a parent as afforded by the 14th Amendment of the U.S. Constitution, resign your office now. You are derelict in your duties to the citizens of this county, state, and country. If you don't know the laws that you are adjudicating, resign because you are derelict in your duties to the citizens.
There are no "mommy's rules". There are no daddy's rules. There is only one ultimate law in this country and that is the United States Constitution and the 14th Amendment that gives all the right of equality under the law. I suggest that you read the USSC ruling in Troxell to see where a superior court stands on this issue, a ruling that you are supposed to respect and follow. I also recommend that you read Santosky v Cramer for the USSC's ruling on the quality of evidence that you must use before you can make any ruling.
While I have been a strong supporter of the Constitutional Argument that argument has now become a dead issue. No, let me rephrase that a beat-dead issue. Too many have attempted to use this argument that never should have tried. That poor usage has made that legal argument dead. While the principle is there, going down this road is a rabbit hole for any parent as a legal argument.
The argument has to change if we are to move forward. The approach has to change if we are to move forward. No more standing on street corners protesting and whining that “my rights as a parent were taken away”, frankly you look like a fool to not only the general public but to your children. Throw your Halloween costumes away or at least save them for that one day a year when they are appropriate. Changing this system of law takes a suit and tie and a sense of politics. Not just politics but the politics of politics.
You have to be able to present the problem cleanly and concisely. You cannot complain about a problem if you cannot also present a comprehensive solution to that problem at the same time. You have to have a “hook” to draw the legislator into an open discussion of the problem.
“Why do we remove fit parents from the lives of children every day?”
Seems like a funny question to some but I guarantee that it will suck a legislator into a conversation. You must be prepared for the counter-arguments that will come and the facts to back what you have to say. Not being prepared will make you look like an idiot and will lose an opportunity. Those of us who have been down this road successfully are more than willing to teach you how to do this and to help you be prepared.
I have been actively involved in the writing of Ohio's custody law that was introduced as HB232, which would give all equal rights to parent their child so long as they are fit. That same legislation was reintroduced without changes that would have given it a chance for passage. Both of these bills failed to clear the committee.
This time the legislation was completely revamped and updated. It comprehensively solves every problem that divorcing, separated, or never-married parents face when they enter the court. It solves one of the major problems of unfairness in child support awards by having the courts deviate from the tables and divide the support obligation based on the time that each parent has with the child.
With a baseline of equal legal and physical custody, the power of the family is now back in the hands of the family rather than a third party. The family is deciding how their family will be handled after the end of the marriage or the relationship.
This is the solution, not the way that it has been done for years.
Ray R. Lautenschlager
Legislative Director
