Dads
and School
August 8, 2022
With school starting, I want to pass on some tips for you to use that come from experience. Some toes got crushed literally (I broke a toe building a new playground at his school) and figuratively along the way.
You need to get on this from the start and don’t present yourself as a bully or angry. Attitude is everything.
·
Introduce
yourself to the teachers and to the principal of the school at the first chance
you have.
You do have chances before school begins and shortly after to do this and this
is your chance to make a first impression of yourself as a dad. I got forced
into doing this because of a registration problem that had to be handled before
school started. Fortunately, the principal agreed with me as we discussed the
issue calmly and I explained what my custody paperwork said and showed her where
it said.
I met his teacher at the first open house. She found out that I am sarcastic
but I cleared that up fast. She had complimented me on how well-behaved he was
and I told her that I “beat it into him”, I got the stink eye look but then
quickly explained that I was kidding.
She and his other teachers found out that I joked often but got down to
business when it was needed.
·
Make sure that
there is a full copy of your custody order on file with the office and let the
teacher know that it is there also.
Am I repeating
myself? Yes and for good reason, this is your most important step to take, and
doing so can eliminate major problems and confusion down the road. Teachers
become eyes in the classroom for you with possible changes in behavior such as
undone homework or excessive sleepiness while with one or the other of you.
They will see better performances in subjects when they are with the father or
the mother.
If for some reason you find yourself back in court, discretely let the teacher
know in case there is a change in behavior or change in their normal mood.
Teachers do notice and will appreciate the heads-up.
·
At the first
parent-teacher conference make sure you are there and let your intentions be
made know that you will be actively participating in your child’s education.
See above because
that tale that you have heard about mothers and fathers excelling in certain
areas of a child’s education is true. That has been confirmed by many teachers
that I have talked with.
·
Volunteer to
help with field trips.
Field trips - the
day that they take the kids that are normally contained within the classroom to
an uncontrolled environment and try to contain them while teaching and still
trying to protect their safety.
I have done more than my share of field trips over the years when my son was in
school. Museums, zoos, national parks, and baseball games are some of the
locations. A teacher alone cannot do all that needs to be done and does need
the help of parents, men, and women. It is easier to break the classroom of
kids into smaller supervised groups for the day and to handle all the little
tasks that come along.
Besides, you might learn something yourself or get to do something you normally
wouldn’t get to do.
One trip was to the Stark County Historical Museum/McKinley Memorial which I
hadn’t been to since I was in school and it had significantly changed. The
lowest level is a recreation of early Canton shops and buildings including the
first fire engine and station complete with a fire pole. Kids were told they
could slide down the pole if an adult went up to help them. I was a blur to the
top of those steps and I used the pole to get down.
The last field trip of the year was to a morning baseball game at the minor
league team in town. I had told his teacher that I was not going so someone
else could take my place. A week later I was told that I was requested by the
kids to go. That was an event-filled day from a public bus ride to kids
cutting in line in front of his class when waiting for a snack (the line cut
didn’t last), top it with a fight where I had to step in between a couple of
boys and pull them apart.
Dad your help is more than appreciated on field trips so step up and volunteer.
·
Volunteer to
be a “Room Mother” to help with class parties.
Don’t let that label
mislead you; men can be a “Room Mother” also. It is not as big of a deal as
they make it out to be and it is more a chip in of money and time to shop for
supplies. Anyone can fill cups with juice and candy on party day.
So break that stigma and stick your nose into “sacred ground” and step on those
toes.
The traditional Mother’s Day project has been a flower in the cup. I
usually got the flower not because my son didn’t respect his mother, but more
because he respected the flower more. She had a brown thumb and killed them
fast.
Father’s Day projects, I have only heard of and seen one over the years and
that came from one of my son’s teachers. What she did was have each child in
the class write a letter to the father for Father’s Day in their handwriting.
She mailed the letters to the home on her own so they would arrive the week of
Father’s Day. Dads, get in there and suggest this for your child’s class.
Volunteer
to help with special events like “Field Day or Sports Day”.
These
are fun play days towards the end of the school year. Most have various
stations where the kids do certain fun things for a while and then move on to
the next station.
My domain was the Obstacle Course from the beginning of my son’s time in
Elementary School. I did throw my twist into it so I could have some fun for
the day.
I barked out orders at the kids and teachers, even the principal, like a drill
sergeant. I did it through their running of the obstacle course but knowing
that not all of them could do everything I would be whispering encouragement to
them or physically helping them along the way.
Teachers got the full treatment and teasing along the way as I teased them
about their age (kids couldn’t hear it) and often we were laughing so hard we
almost had to stop. The principal, well that was funny since the kids were not
used to someone bossing her around. She knew what to expect since she had watched
me with the kids as well as the teachers. As I was throwing the barbs at her
she kept muttering that she was going to get back at me. Creativity and an
early established relationship made it all that much more fun for all.
If
You Recognize a Problem Speak Up.
My son’s school was part of an experimental reading program that they were planning
to roll out district-wide. The kids were assigned a reading list that was “age
appropriate” that they would read and then be tested on to see how when they
comprehended the contents of the book. A group of teachers and I were talking
and I was told that my son was struggling in the program and seemed
disinterested in reading. I replied that he read every night and understood
what he was reading while he was with me. I told them that it might be that the
books on their reading list didn’t interest him and I asked if other kids were
having the same problem. I was told yes. The suggestion was made that the ones
that were struggling or disinterested be allowed to pick their books for the
program
The adjustment was made and a couple of weeks later one of the teachers told me
that my suggestion worked and that they were making officially part of the
program. At the end of the year, I was introduced to the Superintendent of
Schools as the person that solved the problem in the reading program and he thanked
me. Remember, as a parent, you are outside eyes on your child’s education and
just may see the one thing that will not only help your kid but every child in
the district now and into the future.
Dig in and get involved gentlemen.
Ray
R. Lautenschlager
Legislative Director
440-281-5478
president@ohiofamilyrights.com
